It’s a date!

Last Wednesday was not only my 33wk mark but also the day I found out when they’ll start the process of baby coming into the world! I have, after what feels like an age though I know it isn’t, got my induction date. My first experience of the hospital, when it comes to my ownContinue reading “It’s a date!”

8weeks and counting.

As the birth gets closer my anxiety is growing tenfold. I’ll happily admit that the reason I wasn’t sure I wanted to be a mum was because the idea of childbirth terrified me. None of the options sounded good. Hospitals can be scary, faceless, places and as much as the staff are lovely (the majorityContinue reading “8weeks and counting.”

Things that you don’t realise until you’re expecting a critically ill child.

These are all just my personal experiences, I imagine the journey is completely different for every parent going through something like this. I’m 30wks today and as the weeks begin to count down, my anxiety is building back up. I cannot wait to meet him, to see which of us he looks like and seeContinue reading “Things that you don’t realise until you’re expecting a critically ill child.”

11 weeks to go.

Two weeks ago was my (repeatedly rescheduled due to snow) 26wk midwife appointment. I am spoilt with the care I receive from my midwife team. They’re based in a midwife led unit in a town all of 5miles from my home and before diagnosis, I was actually looking forward to giving birth there and withContinue reading “11 weeks to go.”

That’s my secret, I’m always angry.

I think the hardest thing so far has been the anger, swiftly followed by the crippling guilt. The anger is sporadic, chest tightening and blinding. I find myself begrudging anyone else with a “normal” pregnancy. People who are worrying about sleepless nights and nappy changes. I would give everything and anything in this world toContinue reading “That’s my secret, I’m always angry.”

How it began.

It feels like yesterday that I snuck off to take a pregnancy test and saw that little pink line. It didn’t feel real at the time and it often doesn’t now (until I’m booted in the bladder). I still remember the look of shock on Steve’s face when I waved a pee stick at himContinue reading “How it began.”

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